You Are Not Limited to One Version of Your Story

Someone introduced me recently by a version of myself I haven’t been in years. They meant it kindly. They were trying to place me. Fashion girl. Youngest daughter. Ex-Corporate executive. And I smiled because that version of me was real. She worked hard. She got me here. She’s just not the whole story anymore.

I think a lot of women end up living inside other people’s favorite chapter of them. The strong one. The reliable one. The successful one. The helper. The one who always figures it out.

And after a while, you can start performing that version of yourself even when you’ve already outgrown her.** You are not limited to one version of your story.** People love labels because labels make us easier to understand. If you were the funny one, stay funny. If you were the girl with the big career, don’t confuse anyone by wanting something different. If you were called bossy when you were little, maybe you learned to soften your opinions so other people felt more comfortable. Funny how the qualities girls are often taught to tone down ...their ideas, opinions, ambition, voice, leadership...are exactly the qualities many women spend adulthood trying to reclaim.

A label is not a life sentence, and personal growth doesn’t require you to reject who you used to be. Every chapter can be true. You can be grateful for the woman who climbed the corporate ladder and still want a completely different life now. You can honor the version of you who survived a hard season without making that season your identity forever. You can be really good at something and still decide it isn’t right for you anymore. That isn’t failure. That’s self-awareness. That’s confidence. That’s learning to trust yourself enough to change.

And yes, changing can make other people uncomfortable. Someone may tell you, “You seem different.” Good. Maybe you are. You don’t have to keep abandoning yourself just to remain recognizable to everyone else. And becoming the next version of yourself doesn’t always require blowing up your entire life. Sometimes it’s quieter. You tell the truth sooner. You set the boundary. You stop over-explaining yourself. You admit you want something different. You walk into rooms that feel more like you.

Maybe the better question isn’t, “Who have I always been?” Maybe it’s, “Who am I now?”And maybe even more importantly, “Who am I no longer available to be?” That question has changed more of my life than any five-year plan ever could. Your past is not a contract. You are allowed to outgrow identities, careers, relationships, expectations, and versions of success that once fit you perfectly. You are a woman in motion. Keep becoming. The next version of you gets to exist, too.

Cheers to her.

xo
Alana